Let’s face it: being a mom is hard. Being a developer is hard. Being both? Well, that’s basically running a high-stakes production environment 24/7 while also managing a real-life mini-team who might be eating crayons or hacking your Zoom calls. So, let’s talk about the thing that everyone loves to mention but no one seems to have time for—self-care. Because let’s be real, who has the luxury of long spa days when you’re fixing bugs, deploying code, and trying to remember if it’s taco night or parent-teacher conference night?
But here’s the thing: self-care isn’t just bubble baths and cucumbers on your eyes. Self-care is essential, especially for developer moms who are constantly juggling a million things—without dropping any tickets in the backlog.
Why Self-Care is Important for Developer Moms
1. Your Brain Needs to Reboot
You reboot your laptop when it’s acting slow. Why not do the same for your brain? You can’t just debug code all day and then immediately switch into mom mode without some kind of reset. Burnout is real, and the last thing you need is to accidentally commit spaghetti code because you’re running on 3 hours of sleep and 7 cups of coffee.
2. You Need to Avoid Crashing
If you don’t take care of yourself, you’re going to crash harder than a badly-written program in production. And when moms crash, it’s not pretty. Let’s avoid the “blue screen of death” for your life, shall we?
3. Better Mental Clarity = Better Code
Ever tried to solve a coding problem after your toddler threw a tantrum, the dog ate your sock, and the Slack notifications won’t stop? Yeah, your code is probably going to resemble a Jackson Pollock painting. A little self-care helps you maintain mental clarity, which means fewer bugs in your code and fewer accidental merges to master.
How to Actually Do Self-Care (Without Quitting Your Job)
So now that we’ve established that self-care is not just a “nice-to-have” but a “must-do,” let’s get into how you can actually fit it into your life without abandoning your keyboard or your kids.
1. Take Breaks – Like, Real Breaks
Not the “I’m just going to check my email real quick” kind of break. We mean real breaks. Go outside. Yes, outside. The big world beyond your monitor. Remember that sun thing? It’s free, and it’s nice. Walk around, stretch, and breathe fresh air that doesn’t smell like reheated coffee. Even a short walk can make a big difference.
2. Learn to Say “No” (Or, At Least, “Not Now”)
Your backlog is endless. So is your child’s ability to ask for snacks. You don’t have to do everything right now. Prioritize like a boss—whether that’s pushing off a code review or teaching your kid that snack #5 for the day can wait. Saying “no” is empowering, and it’s a form of self-care that keeps you from becoming a 24/7 code machine (or snack machine).
3. Set Boundaries – For Work and Home
Sure, you could work late to squash that bug, but will it really matter in the long run if you’re too tired to function tomorrow? Setting boundaries—like no working after 6 p.m. or putting your phone on “Do Not Disturb” for an hour—gives you the mental space to breathe, relax, and yes, even nap.
4. Master the Art of “Me Time”
“Me time” doesn’t have to be hours long. It can be 15 minutes of mindless scrolling, playing your favorite game, or even binge-watching that show. Whatever it is, it’s for you, and it’s sacred. Don’t let anyone tell you that your “me time” isn’t important because it’s keeping you sane—and keeping your code bug-free.
5. Incorporate Self-Care Into Your Routine
Why not automate your self-care like you would any mundane task? Set alarms to remind yourself to stand up, hydrate, or do a quick meditation. You already use timers for meetings and code deploys—why not for your well-being? Also don’t forget to fuel your body with nutritious foods.
6. Delegate Like You Mean It
Just because you can do everything doesn’t mean you should. Whether it’s at work or home, delegate tasks. Assign someone else to handle the household chaos while you finish that pull request, or delegate non-critical tasks at work. You’re not just a developer and a mom; you’re a leader. Leaders delegate!
7. Laugh at the Chaos
Let’s be honest, life is absurd. One minute you’re debugging a server issue, the next minute you’re wiping applesauce off your face. Sometimes the best form of self-care is simply laughing at how ridiculous it all is. Your life is basically a sitcom. Enjoy it!
In Conclusion: You Got This, Mama
Self-care for developer moms isn’t about luxury—it’s about survival. It’s about recharging your batteries, avoiding burnout, and maintaining your sanity (and your ability to write clean code). You’re a rockstar at work, and you’re a superhero at home. But even superheroes need to take off the cape sometimes.
So, take a deep breath, step away from the code for a moment, and remember: you’re doing an amazing job. The bugs can wait, but your well-being can’t.
